![]() ![]() If a child routinely avoids eye contact, then this is a sure sign that they are either frightened or overloading and most likely it is because they are overloading. Especially when we start exploring the difficulties they face in the classroom or the playground. Their capacity to sustain eye contact diminishes dramatically when I start asking them about school. In other words, they need to look away in order to maximise their chance of understanding what you are saying and assembling a coherent answer. Having assessed nearly 2,000 clients, I observe that many children with auditory processing disorder are unable to maintain eye contact when conversing. ![]() When we cannot speak: Eye contact disrupts resources available to cognitive control processes during verb generation. So they concluded that when we look away, “We are trying to keep our brains from overloading.” Source: Kajimura S, Nomura M. This is because eye contact and verbal processing “share cognitive resources.” Therefore multitasking (looking and listening) impose more stress on the brain. Researchers suggest that while sustaining eye contact builds the connection with the other person, it is demanding on the brain. The researchers found that study participants were able to respond quicker to difficult questions, if they broke eye contact. Scientists at Kyoto University have discovered that maintaining eye contact while listening to another sometimes overtaxes the brain’s capacity to “share cognitive resources.” So one breaks eye contact in order to better process what’s being said. Research reveals why it is difficult for some to sustain eye contact Looking away increases the chance that they will comprehend your message. By looking away they can better concentrate on what you are saying. So the solution is to look away to reduce the processing load. For many people, looking and listening is simply too much to process without overloading. The difficulty they face listening is amplified if there is background noise or when listening to fast or indistinct speech. Those with weak or slow auditory processing tend to struggle to follow conversations and instructions. Looking away may not be rudeness – even in the West ![]() Avoidance can also be interpreted as boredom with the conversation. Avoiding eye contact is thought to reflect, anxiety, socially stress, guilt, or some other negative personality trait. However, in the West maintaining eye contact is usually taken as a sign of courtesy and attentiveness. In many cultures like in East Asia, sustaining eye contact with someone above you socially – professor, parent, or boss can be considered rude or defiant. ![]()
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